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FAQ’S

So what do you guys do?

We organise fantastic dating events for men who like men – that includes gay, bi, pan, queer- who live, work or are new to London, and the surrounding areas, and who want to get together with like-minded guys for friendship or dating. We host regular events, where you can make new friends and dates in a relaxed, friendly atmosphere. Click ‘Upcoming Events’ to see what we have lined up for the coming months!

I've seen other companies which do gay/ same sex speed dating – why should I book with Urban Connections?

  • Our guests will meet everyone else at the event. Other gay speed dating companies will only get you to meet half the room and you end up feeling short changed.
  • We are the only gay speed dating company which offer a complete matching service; we will calculate who you matched with and email you 30m after the event. All other gay speed dating companies get you to fill out bits of paper and wait around awkwardly for an envelope after the event ends. Our exclusive, custom made app offers discretion, ease and privacy. Plus, we are available for any post-event customer care.
  • In fact, we are always here to help with any questions anytime! Contact us
  • We have specialised in running gay speed dating events for the last 13 years (established in 2006) and it’s what we do best. We are passionate about it and our events are not an add on or an afterthought to any other service.
  • If you don’t get any matches, you can come next time for FREE!
  • We have a great mix of guests from all professions, backgrounds and colours; we welcome all gay/ bi/ pan men.
  • We are a gay owned company serving the gay community.
  • Our events really do work! Hundreds of couples meet at our events every year. Check out our testimonials.

Do you send out tickets for your events by post once I have paid online?

No, after paying online you will receive a confirmation email from us (and also an email from Paypal or Eventbrite). This means we have received payment and we will have your name on the night. If you need any more info you can contact us. We try to be environmentally friendly so there is no printing or sending paper tickets by post. Confirmation emails get sent out at the end of each working day. If you don’t receive yours, check your junk email in case or contact us.

What's included in the entry price?

The ticket price includes:

  •  Meeting up to 40 potential mates in one night.
  •  Private use of an exclusive club for the evening.
  •  A team of professional hosts to welcome you and ensure you get the  most from the night.
  •  Use of our custom made app which will email you after the event enabling you to start Whatsapp chats with your matches.
  •  Any assistance or advice you may need before or after the event.
  •  At most venues we include a welcome drink or negotiate a happy hour offer.
  •  Paypal booking fee of £1.50 per place.
  • A guarantee you will receive at least one match – if not you can come again next time for free.

What happens at a Speed dating event?

On arrival, our friendly hosts will greet you and give you a name badge. You can grab a drink at the bar and we will show you to your seat and explain how everything works. You can expect to have a series of up to 40 three minute dates (you will meet everyone else at the event).

Before the dating begins, we ask you to open your speed dating form (we send the link on your confirmation email) on your smartphone (if you don’t have a smartphone, we have paper versions). After each date, you chose whether you want to see that person again or not by selecting either FRIEND, DATE or BOTH next to each guest number.

We’ll be stopping for breaks so you can have another drink and gather your thoughts and our hosts are on hand throughout the evening if you get stuck. At the end of the dating, the data you entered is submitted to our exclusive app which will calculate your matches. You will receive an email 30 minutes after the event with your matches details and a link enabling you to start a Whatsapp chat with them.

How do I get a match?

A match is when you and another guy both want to see each other again. To be matched with another guest you both have to enter the same option on your forms (i.e. you both enter the friend option or you both enter the date option). If you enter date but the other guest ticks friend, that will not be a match. If there’s someone who you really really like, the best thing is to enter BOTH; this will increase your chances of being matched with him.

We will send you a link with your confirmation email which leads to your online form. This is for you to fill out as you move around meeting other guests. You have a list of guests and next to each person, you can enter F (which means you want to be friends with that person) or D (which means you want to go on a real date with that person) or B (which means both friend and date).

You enter FRIEND + he enters FRIEND a FRIEND match

You enter DATE + he enters DATE a DATE match

You enter FRIEND + he enters DATE no match

You enter DATE + he enters FRIEND no match

You enter BOTH + he enters FRIEND = a FRIEND match

You enter BOTH + he enters DATE = a DATE match

You enter BOTH + he enters BOTH = a BOTH match.

I'm not convinced. It sounds scary!

We understand that the first time you try speed dating, you may feel a bit anxious or nervous. We have seen many guests arrive feeling like this but, when the event begins, 99.9% of those guys realise what a fun night it is and wonder why they haven’t tried before. You really don’t have time to feel nervous as every few minutes you are talking and getting to know a new person. This is a perfect way to meet plenty of new guys in one go without wasting a whole evening on one agonisingly bad date. The atmosphere is fun, friendly and chatty. Everyone is there to meet new people. We provide the best Gay Speed Dating in town because we have specialised in this area for over 13 years! You don’t need to stress or do anything. We will be waiting for you with everything you need and show you how everything works.

Any tips?

  • Dress to impress: first impressions count.
  • Don’t be late as it means you may not be admitted; make sure you plan your journey.
  • Be yourself. You are fabulous.
  • Think of some interesting questions beforehand. It can be very repetitive to ask 40 people the same questions!
  • Remember that even though there may be no initial sparks, a relationship could start off as a friendship, so use that option on your form.
  • Body language is everything! Don’t fold your arms or cross your legs as it will create a barrier.
  • No onions or garlic beforehand.
  • Avoid bringing up any subject which could offend; eg. jokes about weight, religion, Brexit etc.
  • Relax! Everyone at our events wants to make new friends. The atmosphere is friendly so don’t worry about coming alone (most people do).
  • If you do not want to see a particular guest again, then DO NOT select him – leave the drop down blank. If you do match, that person will be provided with your name/ email and phone number. Same thing if you feel ‘half hearted’ about selecting him – better to leave it blank to avoid him feeling disappointed.
  • Make sure you enter your selection into the app before the event ends  or you won’t get any matches!

What's a Slow Dating event? What's the difference?

Many guests have expressed a desire to have more time to chat to each guest and to feel less ‘rushed’, so our Slow Dating event gives each guest a full 5 minutes to get to know each other. We use a more intimate bar, with candle-lit tables and we make sure the music is kept low and relaxing. Numbers are kept lower too; you can expect around 13 to 18 guests at a Slow Dating event. But the matching system is kept the same.

I always had the impression Speed Dating was a bit desperate?

Not at all! Gay speed dating has exploded in London and all over the globe over the last couple of years. Many guys are seeking an alternative to swiping on online apps, which tend to be focused on sex. A large percentage of our guests are busy, professionals who just don’t have time to go out and look for a mate; that’s where speed dating really comes into its own. Check the pics from our past events; our guests are young, fun guys who are taking a proactive approach to meeting new gay guys. Our clip, below, will help you with question ideas:

I like the idea but I'm too shy to come alone!

There is no need to be! Most of our guests come alone and you won’t stay alone for long! You can also bring a friend if you don’t want to come alone; they can stay at the bar for moral support. Attending our events is a positive step toward making new friends and possibly meeting a partner. If you don’t take a chance, you will never know…

What kind of guys will be there?

People like you! We welcome all backgrounds and believe that diversity makes things more interesting. You may meet someone you would not normally have the chance to. Our guests include architects, ballet dancers, doctors and lawyers.

What's the age range of your events?

Our aim is to bring all sections of the gay community together so there are no age restrictions at most of our events; check our upcoming events page for full details of every event, if there are any age restrictions it will be clearly stated in the ‘age range’ field. Every event brings a different crowd so we don’t know the exact age range before any specific event but, in general, this could be between 25 to 45 – but there are always people outside of this range.

Are your venues wheel chair-accessible? What if I have a disibility?

Please email us for details on the particular venue, as we use many different clubs and bars. We can let you know if there are any stairs or we can allocate you a seat where you don’t need to move after each date; you will remain seated throughout the evening. We can also place you near the bathroom or bar if you have difficulty walking. We will do our best to ensure you are comfortable and have an enjoyable night with us.

Does it actually work? Do guys meet and fall in love?

Yes! Over the past 13 years we have brought together hundreds of couples at our events! Hundreds of friendships have also started with us too. Check out the reviews section on our homepage!

What if I am just looking for new friends rather than love? Can I still come?

Yes! You have two options on your form; friend and date. So our events are also great for guys who are just looking to make new friends and nothing more.

What do I need to do to qualify for the 'no match guarantee offer?

98% of our guests receive at least 2 matches from a typical event. In the rare occasion where a guest did not match with anyone, we will offer free entry to the next event of the same type. We will automatically invite you after the event, you don’t need to do anything. This offer is only valid for the event we specify, so we cannot transfer the free entry to any other date. To qualify for this offer, the guest in question has to have placed several ticks on his form. If the sheet is blank, this will not count. The idea is that guests should be fully participating in the event with the intention of meeting new friends and dates, rather than sitting there without selecting anyone and expecting to come again next time for free.

I came to a speed dating event and didn't receive any matches; what did I do wrong?

Firstly, if you have not received your matches email, then contact us to make sure we have the correct email address! Sometimes our message goes to your junkmail box, so make sure you add us to your safe senders list. If you did not supply an email address on the night, then we will use the one linked to your paypal account. All guests will get an email following the event, even in the unlikely case where you receive no matches.

If you do receive an email saying you did not match with anyone, don’t despair! You will probably be able to benefit from ‘come again for free’ offer. It could be that the particular guys you met at the event were not your cup of tea. Maybe one or more of the following applies:

  • You were very nervous and came across as too shy or aloof.
  • You were too picky and did not select any other guests on your form.
  • You ate garlic or some strong smelling food beforehand?
  • You drunk too much and didn’t realise you came across as out of control?
  • You were very loud and scared people away.
  • You came across as too intense or serious?
  • You joked about something offensive (ie religion/ politics/ weight etc).
  • You booked for a specific age group event but you are outside of that group.

You can’t please all the people all of the time, so don’t sweat it. It’s their loss! The main thing is not to give up; so take up our offer and try our next event for free.

What's the dress-code at your events?

Unless otherwise stated it’s always smart/ casual. Many guys come straight from work so they are in suits while others may be in jeans etc. We will let you know if the venue has a particular dress code, i.e. no trainers etc, but it’s important you are comfortable and express your own style.

How will you use my data?

We comply strictly to GDPR data protection law and will never share your information with any other parties. When you sign up for an event, we ask for your name and your email address.  We will use your email to send you your booking confirmation and register you on our system for that event. We will also use your email address to send you your results after the event. On your online form, there is a check box, where you can select to join our mailing list. If you don’t check that box, we will delete your name and email address 2 weeks after the event and you will not hear from us after receiving your results. If you do join our mailing list, we use your mail to send you monthly invites to our events. That’s it. No junk. You can unsubscribe from our mailing list at any time. Our mailing list is powered by Mailchimp, who are also fully GDPR compliant and their terms and conditions are here.

Why don't you allow guests to exchange or refund their tickets?

We need to be able to guarantee a minimum number of guests at each event. If 10 guests decided, the day before, that they didn’t want to attend, the guests who did attend would feel disappointed looking at empty seats and this would not reflect well on us. We would never have a clear idea of guest numbers for any event. Having a list of guests who want to change to other dates is also unmanageable. It’s complicated to slot them in to future events and, even then, what if they changed their mind a second time? As with tickets for cinema/ sporting events/ theatre, we do not refund nor exchange. Please ensure you are 100% sure you are able to attend before booking your place. In the event of adverse weather conditions, we will refund guests in advance.

What are your Terms and Conditions?

1) Tickets are non refundable, non exchangeable and non transferable. Please make sure you will be able to attend on your chosen date before booking.

2) In the unavoidable situation where we have to cancel an event we will refund you in full through your PayPal account. Urban Connections will not be liable for any transportation or other costs incurred by people who arrive at a cancelled event.

3) We reserve the right to change advertised venues before an event.

4) Guests who arrive more than 10 minutes late for an event may be refused entry; this depends on the event/ venue.

5) Urban Connections or its associates and hosts shall not be liable for any damages arising from participation in an Urban Connections event. This includes damages arising out of any contact with anyone participating in an Urban Connections event. Such damages to include, but not limited to, physical injury, bodily harm or mental distress. Urban Connections events are held at venues over which Urban Connections and it’s associates have no control. Therefore by registering for an event you agree that Urban Connections and its associates have no liability should you suffer any loss or injury to yourself or your personal items whilst on those premises.

6) Urban Connections and its associates and hosts reserve the right to refuse admission to an event, or indeed to eject from an event, anyone it considers not in a fit state to participate due to over intoxication from alcohol or other substances, inappropriate or abusive behavior.

7) Guests who receive no friend or date or both matches after attending a PAID event (and who have fully participated by selecting other guests on their form and who have not arrived late or left early) can attend our following event free of charge. This free place cannot be transferred to any other event or date; it is valid only for the event following the one which they attended.

8) Any guest who books a discounted student place must show a valid student NUS card which has not expired. Failure to do so will result in the guest having to pay the full price (the difference) in cash at the event. There will be no refund.

9) Urbanconnections is not a dating agency and we do not background check any of our attendees so, if guests meet up after our event, we advise them to use the same caution as meeting any other stranger.

9) Some venues may not provide full, or limited, access for our disabled guests. Please contact us in advance of the event to ensure that we can take appropriate steps to allow you to enjoy the event, or, if the venue is limited in the adjustments that can be made, we will offer to help you attend another event at a more suitable venue.

10) You agree that you are responsible for keeping your login and password for your account secret. You acknowledge that we are not responsible for third party access to your account that results from sharing your login or other account details or personal information by you or the theft or misappropriation of your screen name and password. For any complaints please contact us, details above.

11) We take data protection very seriously and will not share your details with any other parties. Your first name and email address will only be sent to other guests with whom you have matched at an event. We may also send you a monthly email with invites, which you can unsubscribe from instantly.

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